Tips for discussions with the people you live with
by Karen Adamedes
Unless you live alone, your home is not just your home. You might share it with family, friends, or housemates. They might not be there all the time while you are working. But chances are they’ll be in the house at some stage when you are trying to work.
When you work from home, you know what you need from the people you live with. They need to be quiet, not interrupt you (particularly while you are on the phone or in a meeting), not play the TV too loud, and if they bring you the occasional cup of coffee, tea, or a snack, that would be an added bonus.
The complication is that it’s their home, too, and it has to work for everyone. When anyone works from home, there needs to be a clear understanding of how the two worlds can work together.
Have a discussion
It’s imperative to discuss and agree on how working and living in the same place will work. Your children may not understand why they can’t burst in and tell you what just happened to Bluey, or ask for help with their homework.
But they will (mostly) understand that a shut door means that you are working and shouldn’t be disturbed. It’s not foolproof, but it can help. Having a discussion about when you need to be undisturbed and how you will let others know (e.g., by closing the door) is a good step towards working and living with others successfully. Mind you, a closed door didn’t help Professor Robert E. Kelly when his children burst into his office while he was being interviewed live on the BBC about South Korean politics in 2017. Not locking his door before going on-air simply made the family an internet sensation. And much debate about the challenges of working from home.
When things go wrong - go with it
You may not be doing a live TV interview, but things will go wrong from time to time. That’s when you really need to go with the flow of being at home. You might not end up with your call being dissected in the international media like the Professor. But handling tricky situations, like unscheduled family appearances on a Zoom call, with a sense of humor and a quick apology is often the best approach. Particularly as so many more people are working from home, your colleagues will understand when your home life becomes part of a business call. It can happen to them, too!
What else to agree on
Setting expectations about the hours you will work can also be helpful. If the people you live with know when you will be available, it will help them work around your requirements. Another issue to clarify is how much household work you can get done in a day. An occasional load of washing or unstacking the dishwasher is one thing. Painting a room or a spring clean is another.
An upfront conversation with people who go out to work about what you need to do in your work day will help manage the potentially unrealistic assumption that when they get home from work, you will have a three-course dinner on the table (with no involvement from a meal delivery service!)